Cars (2006)

A computer-animated story set on an Earth inhabited entirely by sentient vehicles.

The Plot: (Spoilers)

Lightning McQueen

Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson) is a popular rookie race car on the Piston Cup circuit, whose fans include twin Miatas Mia (Lindsey Collins) and Tia (Elissa Knight). He is tied for first place in the series with revered veteran Strip “The King” Weathers (Richard Petty), who plans to retire after the season, and his long-time rival Chick Hicks (Michael Keaton).

Strip "The King" Weathers, Chick Hicks & Lightning McQueen

At the final race in the season, the Dinoco 400 at the Motor Speedway of the South, Lightning takes the lead and maintains it with quick stop in the pit for fuel only without changing tires. On the last lap, both of his rear tires blow out, giving The King and Chick time to catch up, resulting in an unprecedented 3-way tie.

A close finish

Lightning’s pit crew quits after he tells them to stay out of the way of the cameras and declares himself a “one-man show.” The King advises him that he has a lot of talent but to be successful he needs a geed team behind him; Lightning doesn’t really listen though, as he is daydreaming about the fame that he would have if he took the place of the retiring King with his sponsor, Dinoco. The racing officials decide that to resolve the three-way tie, a tiebreaker race will be held in California in one week. Chick mentions to Lightning that whichever one of them gets to California first will have the first chance to talk to Dinoco about becoming their new racer. After a quick appearance at the tent of his current sponsors, Rusty & Dusty Rust-eze (Tom & Ray Magliozzi), makers of Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, (a duty Lightning despises, as the tent is filled with old, rusty cars) Lightning leaves for California in the trailer of his truck, Mack (John Ratzenberger).

Lightning McQueen with the Rust-eze Brothers

Lightning convinces Mack to drive through the night so they will be the first ones to California. In the middle of the night, Mack falls asleep and some punk cars have fun with him, which causes the sleeping Lightning to fall out of the trailer.

Mack being harassed

Lightning wakes up on the interstate and realizes what’s happened, he tries to catch up to Mack, who he can’t see, and when he sees a truck leave the interstate, he thinks its Mack and goes after it, but it isn’t. Lightning gets lost trying to race back to the interstate, and ends up getting chased by an old Sheriff car (Michael Wallis), whose backfiring leads Lightning to think he’s being shot at, into the town of Radiator Springs, where a panicking Lighting crashes through a barbed-wire fence, which hooks onto a statue of the town’s founder. Lighting drags the statue through the town, tearing up the street in the process, until the tangled-up fence finally stops him. The police car tells him he’s in a lot of trouble.

Lightning in a panic

Mack arrives in Los Angeles the next morning to discover that Lightning is missing, and it becomes a huge news story, with Dale Earnhardt Junior (his car with his voice) making a concerned statement, Jay Limo (Jay Leno) making jokes on his show, and the governor of California (a Hummer H1 voiced by Arnold Schwarzenegger) announces that Lightning must be found.

Mack discovers Lightning is missing

Dale Earnhardt, Jr.

Jay Limo

The Governor of California

Lightning wakes up in an impound yard, being watched by a rusty old tow truck named Mater (Larry the Cable Guy) and with a parking boot on one of his front tires. He almost talks Mater into letting him out to “explore the town” when the sheriff arrives to escort him to traffic court.

Lightning in the impound yard meeting Mater

Since Lightning doesn’t have a lawyer present, Mater volunteers to be his lawyer. The court is presided over by Doc Hudson (Paul Newman), who is upset about the condition of his town and threatened to lock up whoever is responsible, but when he sees Lightning he just wants his thrown out of town. A Porsche (Bonnie Hunt) suddenly arrives, and Lightning assumes she’s been sent to help him and he flirts with her. The she reveals that everyone in town knows her; her name is Sally and she’s the city attorney. She convinces Doc and the rest of the town, which includes Ramone (Cheech Marin), a low rider who runs a paint shop, Flo (Jenifer Lewis), who runs the gas station, Sarge (Paul Dooley), a WWII Jeep who runs a surplus store, Fillmore (George Carlin), a hippie Volkswagen Microbus who sells organic fuel, Luigi (Tony Shalhoub), a Fiat and Guido (Guido Quarroni), a forklift, who run a tire shop, Lizzie (Katherine Helmond), a Model T Ford who runs a souvenir shop and Red (Joe Ranft), the town’s fire truck, to make Lightning fix the road as his punishment.

Traffic Court

Lightning is assigned to pull a road-paving machine called Bessie to fix the road he damaged, which Doc says should take five days if he does it right. He initially tries to make a run for it when Mater removes the boot, but the Sheriff had siphoned his gas when he was asleep in the impound so he doesn’t get far. After failing to get a lost couple (Richard Kind & Edie McClurg) to get help, and frustrated with the slow progress, Lightning tries to rush through the work in an hour and does a terrible job, and Doc orders him to scrape off the paving and do it right. When Lightning complains, Doc challenges him to a race. If Lightning wins, he’s free to go; if not, he has to fix the road Doc’s way. The race is a single lap around a dirt track, and the overconfident Lightning crashes on the first turn and has to be rescued by Mater.

Lightning works through the night and does a great job on the section of road he finishes, impressing everyone, including Doc. Doc finds Lightning at the track under the supervision of the Sheriff. He had run out of asphalt and asked if he could try to figure out how to make the turn. Doc takes over for the Sheriff and tries to tell Lightning what he’s doing wrong, but Lightning won’t listen. Meanwhile, the new road has inspired the rest of the town to fix up their own businesses. Sally offers Lightning a room in her Cozy Cone Motel in place of the impound lot.

Lightning doing his Community Service

That night, Mater is assigned to watch Lightning and he takes him “tractor tipping” and demonstrated his ability to drive backwards. When Lightning talks about how important the race is, Mater says he always wanted to ride in a helicopter, and Lightning casually promises it to him. Mater says Lightning is his best friend. At the motel, Sally asks Lightning is he really meant his promise to Mater, and he doesn’t know. He thanks her for letting him stay in the motel.

Mater tractor tipping

The next morning, while waiting to get his daily fuel ration from the Sheriff, Lightning stumbles into Doc’s garage and discovers that Doc is the Fabulous Hudson Hornet who won three Piston Cups in the 1950s. Impressed, Lightning tries to talk to him about racing, but Doc won’t talk to him. No one else in the town believes that Doc could have been a race car. Sally takes Lightning on a scenic drive.

Lightning and Sally out for a drive

Sally and Lightning end up at the abandoned Wheel Well Motel, Sally’s favorite place. Sally explains how she used to be an attorney in Los Angeles but never felt happy, and after breaking down in Radiator Springs she fell in love with the town and decided to stay.

The Wheel Well Motel

From the motel, there is a view of the Radiator Springs area from above. Sally tells the story of Radiator Springs and Route 66 before the interstate was built and how when it was it took away all the traffic from the town.

Sally and Lightning look out over Radiator Springs

When they get back to the town, Mater has set off a tractor stampede. Lightning follows a stray and finds Doc sitting on the track wearing old dirt racing tires. Lightning watches him take a quick lap around the track, drifting around the turn Lightning couldn’t make.

Doc practices his old racing skills

Lighting tries to show how impressed he is, but Doc runs off to his garage. Lightning follows him, trying to talk to him and asking why he quit racing. Doc reveals he didn’t quit; he had a wreck in the season after his third Piston Cup win, and by the time he was fixed everyone had moved on to a new rookie. He tells Lightning to finish the road and leave town.

Lightning tries to connect to Doc

The next morning everyone in town discovers that Lightning finished the road overnight. They initially think he’s already left, but it turns out he hasn’t yet. He shops from everyone in town, including whitewall tires from Luigi & Guido and a classic metallic paint job from Ramone, and inspires everyone to fix all the town’s neon signs.

Lightning shows Sally his new look

That night, as the town celebrates, the media show up and swarm the town, having found Lightning.

The media finds Lightning

Lightning’s manager Harv (Jeremy Piven) tells him his disappearance has given him a lot of publicity and orders Mack to take him to California immediately, and Lightning doesn’t have a chance to say goodbye to his friends.

Mack apologizes to Lightning for losing him

As the media crowd leaves with Lightning, Sally discovers Doc called the media to tell them where Lightning was. He says it is best for everyone, and Sally asks if it’s really best for everyone, or just him. Sad over not being able to say goodbye, everyone goes home and shuts off their lights, leaving Doc alone in the darkened street.

The town is sad to see Lightning go

At the big race at the Los Angeles International Speedway, which is attended by celebrities like Mario Andretti (one of his cars with his voice), Lightning is unable to focus, being distracted by thought of Radiator Springs and his friends. He spends the beginning of the race in a distant third, unable to get by Chick Hicks.

Lightning is in a distant third

Doc comes on his radio, saying he didn’t come all that way to watch him quit. Not only Doc, but everyone from Radiator Springs, except Sally, Lizzie and Red, have come to cheer Lightning on, and Doc is serving as his crew chief, wearing his Fabulous Hudson Hornet paint from his racing days. The media, including announcers Bob Cutlass (Bob Costas) and Darrell Cartrip (Darrell Waltrip), quickly recognize him.

Lighting and his new pit crew

Lightning was a lap behind but he makes it up by the last 10 laps. Chick bumps Lightning, causing one of his tires to blow out. Thanks to Guido, Lightning is able to get four new tires quickly and get back in the race without losing a lap. Chick causes both Lightning and The King to lose control to take the lead, but Lightning uses Doc’s drifting technique to regain control and take the lead.

The effects of one of Chick's dirty tricks

On the last lap, Chick is behind the King and, not wanting to come in third, bumps him hard, forcing him into a serious wreck that takes him out of the race.

The King wrecked

Seeing The King wreck, Lightning is reminded of the wreck that ended Doc’s racing career. Lightning stops short of the finish line, allowing Chick to win the race. Lightning backs up to The King and pushes him back onto the track and across the finish line so he can finish his last race, to the applause of the audience.

Lightning rescues The King

Chick Hicks is awarded the Piston Cup but his behavior leads him to be ignored. The King and his wife (Lynda Petty) thank Lightning for what he did, and Tex (Humpy Wheeler), the head of Dinoco, offers Lightning his sponsorship, but Lightning has learned the importance of friendship and stays with Rust-eze, as they gave him his big break. Tex respects his decision and says if Lightning ever needs anything to just ask. Lightning uses the favor to give Mater a ride in the Dinoco helicopter.

The King and his wife thank Lightning

Lightning moves his racing headquarters to Radiator Springs. Luigi and Guido finally get to meet a Ferrari (Michael Schumacher), who Lightning referred to their shop and Lightning and Sally restore the Wheel Well Motel.

Luigi and Guido meet a Ferrari

Sally and Lightning

My Review:

I don’t think the Pixar team can make a bad movie, and this film lives up to their reputation. Though it doesn’t evoke emotions as strongly as other Pixar films, this is a fun movie. Perhaps because I am a “car guy,” I especially like the realistic depictions of nearly all the vehicles, and the voice casting that includes well-known people from the automotive world, like Richard & Lynda Petty, Darrell Waltrip, Dale Earnhardt, Jr., Mario Andretti and Michael Schumacher. The other voice actors are excellent as well. The film is visually impressive. In addition to the realistic depictions of the cars, the racing scenes are exciting with views that would be impossible in a real race or in any life action film for that matter. The landscapes around Radiator Springs also have a number of automotive-inspired natural features that are quite clever and creative. One small thing that I noticed is that the train locomotive does not exactly match any specific real locomotive. This is something that most people wouldn’t notice, especially since the train’s appearance is very brief, so it doesn’t really detract from the movie, but as a train fan I noticed. A positive of that scene is the wig-wag crossing signals, which closely match a pair that are preserved deactivated in Port Richmond, California, the former home of Pixar’s studios. The movie’s plot is not overly complicated but it makes sense (as long as you can accept the premise of sentient cars) and there are no noticeable plot holes.

As with all Pixar films, Cars is great for kids and is enjoyable for adults as well, especially those with an interest in cars and/or auto racing.

The Bucket List (2007)

Complete strangers meet in a hospital and, with only months to live, decide to see the world.

The Plot: (Spoilers)

Auto mechanic Carter (Morgan Freeman), a trivia buff, gets a call at work with bad news.

Carter was having a good day until he got some bad news

Edward Cole (Jack Nicholson), at a county commissioners meeting where he is trying to privatize a struggling local hospital under his company, starts coughing up blood.

Edward didn't see that coming

Carter & Edward end up sharing a room at one of the hospitals Edward runs, due to his policy of “two beds to a room, no exceptions.” Turns out that he never had a problem with that, as he’d never been sick before, but his assistant Tom (Sean Hayes) says it would cause a big PR problem for him to make an exception for himself.

Edward & Carter sharing a room

Edward has cancer, and after an operation, doctors give Edward only a 5% chance of survival. Over the next few weeks, they get to know each other and become friends. Carter has been in and out of the hospital for months, undergoing an experimental treatment. He has a wife named Virginia (Beverly Todd) and three grown children (one of which is played by Morgan Freeman’s real-life son Alfonso Freeman). He always wanted to be a history professor but dropped out of college when Virginia became pregnant, and he never had the chance to go back, even though he always wanted to. Edward has been married and divorced four times, and says he was never married long enough to have any kids. One night, Carter starts making a “bucket list” that he won’t show Edward. Edward’s doctor comes in to deliver his test results, which aren’t good: Edward has 6 months to a year to live. Edward asks the doctor to find out Carter’s status, as Carter’s doctor is hard to get a hold of. Carter finds out that he too only has about a year left. He crumples up his list and throws it on the floor.

New friends

The next morning, Edward finds the list and asks what it is. Carter explains that his old philosophy teacher once assigned them to make a list of things they wanted to do before they “kicked the bucket” and he was re-doing the list for himself. Edward likes the idea and adds things like “go skydiving,” “get a tattoo” and “kiss the most beautiful girl in the world” to Carter’s existing list of “witness something truly breathtaking,” “help a complete stranger for the good,” “laugh till I cry” and “drive a Shelby Mustang.” Edward convinces Carter into fulfilling the list together, as they are both asymptomatic. Carter’s wife doesn’t understand and blames Edward for taking her husband away.

It's been decided

They start with the skydiving, which terrifies Carter but Edward enjoys it. Edward’s assistant Tom is tagging along to arrange everything, whose name is actually Matthew, but Edward prefers to call him “Tom.” They go on to driving muscle cars on a racetrack; Carter gets to drive a Shelby GT350 Mustang while Edward drives a Dodge Challenger R/T. Carter gets a little wild in his driving, intentionally bumping Edward’s car and challenging him over a small jump. They go to a tattoo parlor and Edward gets an elaborate tattoo of himself but Carter refuses, saying he doesn’t see anything he wants to be stuck with.

Cool cars

They fly to France to dine on caviar in a waterfront restaurant. Edward admits to Carter that he has a daughter named Emily that he doesn’t see anymore. Carter tries to add “get back in touch” to the list, but Edward refuses. Carter suddenly rushes off to the bathroom and Edward thinks that he upset him, but it turns out the catheter in Carter’s chest came loose and he started bleeding, but he was able to stop it. Back at Edward’s French villa, while Carter takes a bath, Edward gets a call from Virginia, who asks him to bring her husband back. Edward suggests to Carter that, because of the catheter incident, maybe they should postpone the rest of the trip, but Carter realizes that his wife called.

They continue on an African safari and visit the pyramids in Egypt. On top of one of the pyramids, Edward tells Carter why he doesn’t see his daughter anymore. When she was about to get married, there was something about her fiancé that led Edward to oppose the marriage. Naturally, he wasn’t invited to the wedding. The husband turned out be abusive, and the first time he hit Emily, she came to Edward, but said that it wasn’t her husband’s fault as he’d been drinking and she started the fight, but she still loved him. The next time, Edward heard about it from his ex-wife, and he hired someone to “take care of it.”All he knows is that the husband wasn’t killed and Emily never saw him again. When Emily found out what Edward did, she declared that he was dead to her.

The big gun has a lot of kick

Visiting the Taj Mahal in India, Edward and Carter discuss death. Edward doesn’t know what to have done with his remains. Carter wants to be cremated and have his ashes put in a Chock full o’Nuts coffee can and buried somewhere with a view.

They ride the Great Wall of China on a motorcycle and then try to climb Mount Everest to fulfill “witness something truly majestic” but they are too late in the season; a storm has already moved in and they won’t be able to climb till the next spring. Edward suggest that maybe it is a sign that it is time for them to go home, but Carter knows he’s just talking about him and refuses.

Is this actually allowed?

They go on to Hong Kong, where they plan to wear silk suits and eat black walnut ice cream. Carter is approached at the bar by a beautiful young woman. They seem to have a lot of common interests, and she invites him up to his room, but he politely declines, saying he is already married. He realizes Edward arranged the encounter and tells him he’s ready to go home. He asks Edward how he knew he’d turn her down, and Edward says he didn’t.

She's too good to be true

Back in America, the driver takes them to the home of Edward’s daughter Emily, which Edward’s assistant had arranged at Carter’s insistence. Edward refuses to try to patch things up with her and leaves with the car leaving Carter and his assistant at the side of the road. Carter takes a cab home to his wife and has a big family dinner, while Edward is left alone in frustration and eventually tears.

This won't end well

After the dinner, Carter collapses and is rushed to the hospital. Edward goes back to work and is eventually notified of Carter’s condition and comes to visit him. The cancer has metastasized to Carter’s brain, and he may not survive. Carter’s wife gives Edward a letter that she was supposed to give him after Carter’s death, but she decided not to wait. While waiting for surgery, Carter and Edward share a laugh about the origin of Edward’s exotic coffee, fulfilling “laugh until I cry.” Carter gives Edward the list and tells him to finish it himself.

At least they can still share a laugh

In his car, Edward reads the note from Carter, which tells him how much the trip helped him and how he reconnected with his wife when he returned and asks Edward to find the joy in his life. Edward goes to successfully reconcile with his daughter Emily, and meets his granddaughter, and leads him to cross off “kiss the most beautiful girl in the world.”

Not as hard as he thought

Edward speaks at Carter’s funeral, and talks about how they traveled the world together and were complete strangers three months earlier. He realizes that he can cross off “help a complete stranger for the good.”

Edward speaks at Carter's funeral

After Edward dies, his assistant climbs to the top of Mount Everest and places a Chock full o-Nuts can containing Edward’s remains, in a concrete monument next to another can with Carter’s remains. He crosses off the remaining item on the list, “witness something truly majestic,” and leaves the list between the two cans.

Final resting place

My review:

This movie is carried by the acting, and Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson are as excellent as ever. Most of the supporting cast isn’t very prominent, but Sean Hayes does a very good job as the long-suffering assistant of Jack Nicholson’s eccentric character, and the two have some amusing banter. Beverly Todd also does a good job as Virginia. The plot works well; most of the moments in the trip are fun to watch, and the ending is a tearjerker. If there is anything I can criticize in this movie, it is that both of the main characters seem to have a lot of energy and little difficulties from their cancer or the treatments from the beginning of their trip until Carter suddenly collapses at home, and they don’t seem to need any significant treatment during their trip. I don’t know much about cancer, but this seems unlikely at best. This didn’t make the movie any less enjoyable to me, however.

The Bucket List is an enjoyable movie with two great actors.

Transformers (2007)

A high school kid just wants a car and a girl. He ends up with a car that is actually an alien robot involved in a battle with other alien robots in which the fate of the world is at stake, and he hooks up with the hottest girl in school.

The Plot: (Spoilers)

An opening voiceover tells of an ancient cube with the power create worlds and fill them with life, that was lost to outer space in a war over its power that destroyed a world. Those searching for the cube to rebuild their world were led to the previously unknown planet Earth.

At the US SOCCENT military base in Qatar, as a group of soldiersreturn from a mission, a mysterious US military helicopter approaches without making contact.

Soldiers returning from a mission are looking forward to some relaxation they aren't going to get

Fighter planes sent to investigate ID it as a helicopter that was reportedly shot down. As one soldier, a Captain (Josh Duhamel), is talking to his wife and infant daughter via videophone, the helicopter lands at the base and transforms into a giant robot armed with energy weapons that downloads the base’s computer files. Some soldiers disconnect the power and the robot starts destroying the base. Another soldier (Tyrese Gibson) manages to take a photo of the robot, and he, the Captain who was talking to his family and a few others try to get away.

That's one big robot!

High school student Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is giving a genealogy presentation in his history class about his great great grandfather Archibald Witwicky, who explored the Arctic Circle and was later thought to be crazy for claiming to have seen a giant iceman and drawing strange symbols. His teacher (Peter Jacobson) initially gives him a B-minus, because the presentation included him trying to sell family antiques, which he also tries to sell on eBay, but Sam explains how his father agreed to buy him a car if he earned $2000 in three days, which he did, but a B-minus on the project would negate the deal. The teacher gives him an A-minus.

Sam Witwicky in class

Sam’s dad (Kevin Dunn) takes him to a shady used car lot, where Sam takes a liking to an old yellow Camaro that has appeared on the lot without the lot owner, Bobby Bolivia (Bernie Mac), knowing anything about it. Bolivia says the Camaro is $5,000, but Sam’s dad won’t pay more than $4,000. Bolivia tries to sell them a yellow VW Beetle next to the Camaro for $4,000, but the Camaro’s passenger door swings open hard, severely denting the Beetle. Bolivia starts talking about another car on the lot, when a soundwave emanating from the Camaro shatters the windows of every other car on the lot. Bolivia agrees to sell the Camaro for $4,000.

This should have been seen as a bad sign

At the Pentagon, Secretary of Defense John Keller (Jon Voight) meets with a group of young people who have distinguished themselves in signal analysis, to help identify a signal that was detected when the robot tried to hack into the military’s database through the base in Qatar. Meanwhile some of the survivors from the attack, including the Captain who was talking to his family and the soldier who took a picture of the robot, are trying to get somewhere where they can contact the military, and are being stalked by a robot.

The Secretary of Defense

Sam and his friend Miles (John Robinson) drive Sam’s car to a party at the lake. Sam gets into an argument with a football player named Trent (Travis Van Winkle). Trent’s girlfriend Mikaela (Megan Fox) breaks them up, but Trent then says something to annoy her and she decides to walk home. Sam abandons Miles to give her a ride home. On the way they talk, and the popular Mikaela doesn’t even recognize Sam, despite the fact that they have gone to the same schools since first grade and have many classes together. The car stalls at a romantic spot along the road, and the radio starts operating by itself, which embarrasses Sam. Mikaela offers to look under the hood, and the old Camaro turns out to have an impressive engine. Mikaela reveals that her father taught her all about fixing cars. Mikaela decides to walk the rest of the way, and Sam begs his car to start, which it does, and he drives her the rest of the way home. Outside her house, she says she had a good time with him.

Sam drives Mikaela home

At the National Military Command Center at the Pentagon, a young analyst (Rachael Taylor) picks up the signal they are searching for, which is coming from a robot (voice of Reno Wilson) on Air Force One that disguises itself as a small portable stereo. The robot is using Air Force One’s connection to plant a virus and at the same time download information about the iceman that Sam’s grandfather reportedly discovered on September 7, 1895, information on which is classified Top Secret. The Pentagon severs the connection in the middle of the transfer. The robot is discovered by secret service agents, but it is bulletproof and kills the agents before they can report it. Air Force One lands and the robot escapes into a waiting police car, whose driver largely ignores it. The robot reports on something called the all spark and uses the internet to make the connection between Sam’s grandfather and Sam, who it intends to track down.

Don't you hate when someone reads over your shoulder?

Sam is awoken by the sound of his car’s engine, and his spots his car driving away. While chasing it on his bike, he reports the theft to 911 on his cellphone. He tracks the car to a sawmill, where from a distance he sees his car transformed into a giant robot, shining a spotlight into the sky. He records a video message on his cellphone, saying his car is alive, and tries to get closer, but is chased by guard dogs into the old sawdust burner. Sam’s car breaks in and Sam still thinks someone is driving his car. Seconds later a police car breaks in and the officers take Sam into custody.

At the Pentagon, the young female analyst who detected the signal on Air Force One sneaks into a meeting where top officials and Defense Secretary Keller are discussing the situation. She doesn’t think any of their ideas are actual possibilities and interrupts with theories of her own that sound crazy to everyone else. Keller tells her that he’ll only listen if she has some proof of her ideas.

Getting chewed out by the Secretary of Defense

In Qatar, the survivors of the base attack are almost to a village with a phone when they are

attacked by a giant scorpion-like robot. Under attack, they make to the village where they get a cellphone and call the Pentagon. A Predator drone is sent in to send back pictures and air gunships open fire on the robot, which withstands almost everything they fire and escapes underground, damaged. The men are rescued and are to be returned to the United States as soon as possible.

Not Again!

The analyst at the Pentagon thinks there’s only one hacker who can figure out the signal, so she copies it to a memory card and takes it to him. His name is Glen (Anthony Anderson) and he finally reveals her name is Maggie. The Pentagon catches on to her pretty quickly though and send the FBI after her, and just as they find out the signal has to do with the iceman and Witwicky and something called Sector Seven, the FBI break in and arrest them.

Sam is home, having been bailed out of jail by his dad. Sam’s car returns to his house. Sam thinks the car is stalking him and tries to outrun it on his mother’s bike.

I think it's obvious who will win this race

In the process of running from his car, Sam runs into Mikaela and her friends. Mikaela goes after him on her motorscooter. Sam doesn’t realize it, but he is also being pursued by a Saleen Mustang Police Car.

Anyone think this might not be a real police car?

Hiding from his Camaro, he spots the police car and tries to get help, but the police car transforms into a robot (voice of Jess Harnell) and asks Sam about his eBay auctions.

Would this be considered an Advanced Interrogation Technique?

The Camaro knocks down the robot, giving Sam a chance to escape, and he runs into Mikaela again, with the robot chasing him. The Camaro rescues them and the robot turns back into the police Mustang and follows them to a refinery. The Camaro ejects Sam and Mikaela and turns into a robot.

I guess Sam won't have to worry about getting an alarm system

It's always shocking when your car turns into a robot

The police car also turns back into a robot, and ejects the smaller robot that was on Air Force One. At the large robots fight, the smaller robot goes after Sam and catches him, but Mikaela finds a power saw and cuts up the smaller robot. The robot’s head continues to operate independently, and it grows new spider-like legs, finds Mikaela’s dropped purse and takes the place of her cellphone. Meanwhile, Sam’s “car” has damaged the other robot and introduces itself, though it can only communicate through its radio. It turns back into a Camaro and Sam and Mikaela get in, and Mikaela retrieves her purse.

At long last, an introduction

As they drive, Mikaela wonders why a sophisticated robot would disguise itself as an old beat-up Camaro. The Camaro stops on the side of the road and throws them out. Sam thinks she hurt the car’s feelings, but it copies the design of a passing car to become a new 2010 Camaro, which impresses Sam and Mikaela.

The best $4,000 Sam ever spent

The Camaro drives Sam and Mikaela to the Griffith Observatory, where they see four meteorites strike nearby. The meteorites are robots, which disguise themselves as copies of nearby vehicles, and they all meet up with Sam and Mikaela and the Camaro. All of the vehicles transform into robots. The leader is Optimus Prime (voice of Peter Cullen), whose disguise is a Peterbilt semi tractor. He introduces the others: First Lieutenant Jazz (voice of Darius McCrary) whose disguise is a Pontiac Solstice, weapons specialist Ironhide (voice of Jess Harnell) whose disguise is a GMC Topkick C4500 truck, medical officer Ratchet (voice of Robert Foxworth) whose disguise is a Hummer H2 Search & Rescue Truck, and finally Sam’s guardian Bumblebee, the Camaro, whose vocal processor was previously damaged in battle. Optimus Prime explains that they are Autonomous Robotic Organisms, or Autobots, from the planet Cybertron, and are trying to find the Allspark before Megatron, a Decepticon who started a war that destroyed their planet and traced the Allspark to Earth and crashed, and Sam’s great grandfather found him by accident under the ice in the Arctic Circle and accidently activated Megatron’s navigation system which microscopically imprinted the coordinates of the Allspark on Witwicky’s glasses, which were among the antiques Sam was trying to sell on eBay. If Megatron finds the Allspark first, he can use it to transform Earth’s machines into a new army that would destroy the human race.

The gang's all here

On an Air Force cargo plane, the survivors from Qatar are analyzing the tail of the scorpion-like robot that attacked them that broke off when the gunships attacked it. The tail is able to move on its own.

Maggie and Glen are alone in an interrogation room. When the agents come in Glen cracks immediately and puts all the blame on Maggie, who tells them about Witwicky and Sector Seven.

The Autobots take Sam back to his house to retrieve the glasses, which he has trouble finding. In an amusing scene, the Autobots try to hide from Sam’s parents, who keep bothering him and have snuck Mikaela into his room to help him look, and manage to destroy the back yard (but Sam’s dad chalks it up to earthquakes, as the Autobots have shaken the house.

The Autobots "hide" in the backyard

When the Autobots accidentally knock out the power, Sam’s parents bust into his room, and argue with Sam until Mikaela shows herself.

Hanging around the house

The glasses are in Sam’s backpack, which his mom says are in the kitchen. Sam gets the glasses and is about to give them to Optimus Prime, when a Sector Seven team shows up and the leader (John Turturro) arrests everyone. The Autobots intercept them to free Sam and Mikaela, but the Sector Seven leader calls for reinforcements, and Sam, Mikaela and Bumblebee are again captured. Optimus Prime determines they can’t be rescued without harming humans. In all the action, Sam had dropped the glasses, and Optimus Prime finds them.

Bumblebee is captured. Doesn't he look sad?

At the Pentagon, Keller is preparing for a likely war with China when Tom Banacheck (Michael O’Neill) from Sector Seven, advanced research division, arrives carrying a briefcase. The Secretary of Defense has never heard of Sector Seven. Just then, the virus shuts down all computers and communications. Banacheck says he was sent by the President and that Keller needs to see what he has. In a conference room, Banacheck tells Keller that Sector Seven is a special access division of the government, created in secret by a Presidential order from Herbert Hoover. He tells Keller that the Beagle II lander that was lost on Mars didn’t crash, but actually transmitted 13 seconds of footage, which ended with an image of a giant robot. He shows Keller the footage and a copy of the image of the robot, with another photo: the one taken by the soldier in Qatar. They are similar. Banacheck suspects that the virus was planted to they couldn’t respond to the next attack. Keller orders the use of radio to contact their ships and call them back and to prepare for an eminent attack.

Sam and Mikaela, Maggie and Glen, and the surviving soldiers from Qatar, led by Captain Lennox (the one who was talking to his family when the attack started) are all brought to a secret facility at the base of the Hoover Dam, where Sector Seven had the frozen Megatron, or NBE-1 (Non-Biological Extraterrestrial One) as they call him, moved, kept frozen and reverse engineered to form the basis of American technology. The Sector Seven agent that arrested Sam and Mikaela, named Simmons, is there too.

Banachek, Simmons and Sam discuss terms

Sam fills them in on the truth about Megatron and the All Spark cube, and realizes that Sector Seven knows where it is as well. They are taken to a room that looks out over a chamber containing the cube, which is huge. The Hoover Dam was originally built to conceal it.

The cube

The small robot that disguised itself as Mikaela’s cellphone also gets into the secret base and finds the All Spark, and is restored by it to its undamaged form. It transmits a message to other Decepticons, including Starscream who is disguised as an F-22 fighter plane, Barricade the Mustang Police Car, Devastator an M1 Abrams tank, Bonecrusher a Buffalo H Mine-Protected Vehicle and the helicopter.

Banacheck and Simmons take everyone to a room where they have a bulletproof box into which they can channel the cube’s energy. Simmons puts a cellphone into the box and zaps it with the energy, and it transforms into a small robot, which develops various weapons to try to escape. Before it can, Simmons destroys it.

The Decepticon that snuck into the facility starts defrosting Megatron. Sam demands to be taken to Bumblebee. Simmons refuses but the soldiers take Sam’s side, leading to a Mexican standoff, and Simmons agrees. They get Bumblebee and take him to the cube, and Bumblebee causes the cube to collapse into a cube small enough that he can carry it.

That's convenient

The soldiers propose taking the cube to the nearest town, Mission City, which is 22 miles away, and hiding it there, and radioing the Air Force for support. Keller, Banacheck and Simmons agree. Bumblebee, in his Camaro form, leaves with Sam, Mikaela and the Allspark, as Megatron thaws enough to come back to life. Megatron (voice of Hugo Weaving) escapes and gets outside where he meets with Starscream (voice of Charlie Adler), who reports that the humans have escaped with the All Spark.

Megatron

Bumblebee is escorted by the soldiers to the city. On the way, they are joined by the rest of the Autobots, who had figured out the cube’s location from the coordinates etched in the glasses, and then are pursued by the Decepticon vehicles. Bonecrusher (voice of Jim Wood) transforms into his robot form and Optimus Prime transforms to fight him and defeats him. Meanwhile, Keller, Simmons, Maggie and Glen get to the old radio and Glen tries to get a signal out, while the little robots fights its way in, but in the end Glen gets the Air Force to send in F-22s and the little robot accidentally takes itself out.

Optimus Prime vs Bonecrusher

In the city, the soldiers spot an F-22 and think it’s the Air Force, but Ironhide recognizes it as Starscream. He and Bumblebee transform and use a truck to protect the others from Starscream’s weapons fire, and Bumblebee is seriously damaged in the process. As Devastator the tank appears around the corner, Sam doesn’t want to leave Bumblebee, who gives him the All Spark cube.

Bumblebee gives Sam the cube

Jazz, Ironhide, Ratchet and the soldiers fight Devastator, now in his robot form, while Mikaela tries to hotwire a tow truck. Megatron arrives and kills Jazz. The other autobots fall back. The decepticon disguised as the helicopter arrives as well. Mikaela and Sam try to use the tow truck to tow Bumblebee to safety. The soldier tells Sam to get the All Spark to a rooftop where he can be rescued by incoming Blackhawk helicopters. Mikaela stays to try to save Bumblebee and says that whatever happens she’s glad she got into the Sam’s car. Ironhide tells Sam that he and Ratchet will cover him as he gets to the building. As Sam runs for the building, Mikaela drives off in the tow truck with Bumblebee.

I think I'd run too

Just then, Optimus Prime arrives to challenge Megatron.

Perfect timing

Megatron transforms into a futuristic aircraft and attacks Prime, who grabs onto him. After crashing into a couple of buildings, the fight in the street and Megatron knocks Prime down and goes after Sam.

This doesn't look like a good sign

Mikaela and Bumblebee decide to go back and help, with Mikaela driving the tow truck in reverse and Bumblebee firing his weapons, which remain undamaged. They help the soldiers destroy Devastator. Sam reaches the abandoned building he was headed for with Megatron close behind. He reaches the roof and signals the helicopters with a flare, but Starscream takes them out with a missile. Megatron has Sam cornered on the roof, but Prime catches up to them. When Sam refuses to hand over the All Spark to Megatron and Megatron knocks him off the roof, Prime catches him.

Not a good position to be in

In the street below, Optimus Prime tells Sam that if he can’t defeat Megetron, he will sacrifice himself to destroy the All Spark, which will happen if it is combined with his own spark in his chest. Prime and Megatron fight and despite help from the soldiers, who defeat the Decepticon helicopter, and the F-22s, who also have to deal with Starscream, Megatron can’t fully be stopped. Prime tells Sam to put the All Spark cube into his chest, but Sam has the opportunity to put in into Megatron’s instead, and Megatron is killed.

After the battle: Ironhide, Ratchet & Optimus Prime holding Jazz's remains

Bumblebee, his voice (voice of Mark Ryan) restored, asks to remain with Sam, and Prime allows it. The government disbands Sector Seven and deposits the remains of the defeated Decepticons into the Laurentian Abyss, seven miles underwater. The other Autobots remain on Earth as well, hiding in plain sight, and Optimus Prime sends a message into space to any other surviving Autobots, inviting them to join them. Starscream, the only Decepticon to survive, escapes into space.

My Review:

All Transformers really had to deliver was cars that turn into giant battling robots; in addition to more than satisfying that requirement, it also brings a story that is compelling and actually makes sense, at least as much sense as a story about alien robots that transform into cars can be expected to make. I was never into Transformers as a kid, so I don’t have the background to discuss how well the movie respects established canon and since this is a movie about robots from outer space that transform into cars, I’m not really going to go into suspension of disbelief issues, but one thing I will point out is that the weight of the Transformers in their robot modes seemed inconsistent, especially during the final battle. They are all very large and presumably very heavy, and usually when one is thrown into a building, the building is heavily damaged. On the other hand, when we see Megatron corner Sam on the roof of the abandoned building (actually Detroit’s abandoned Michigan Central Station), we see Starscream land on the roof of another building, and see Optimus Prime running on a rooftop and suspending himself between two buildings. It doesn’t seem like the buildings should be able to support the weight of the Transformers, and especially the pounding of Optimus Prime running on a rooftop. The special effects are excellent and everything seems real. The robot modes are “busy” (I think I would have preferred them a bit sleeker) and the transformations are very busy, with a lot of motion that might be a bit too much, but those are stylistic choices. One criticism I’d make is in the cinematography: while it’s good in the scenes with human actors, in many of the robot-only scenes, especially transformation and battle scenes, the camera seems very close to the action. With all the fast-paced movement in the robots, it would make the action a little easier to keep track of. It also might have helped to have given Jazz and Ironhide brighter colors, especially with all the Decepticons being dark and/or metallic. Plot-wise, there is a lot going on in this movie and some of it doesn’t really seem necessary. In particular, the whole business with Maggie and Glen didn’t really add anything to the story, and they could’ve just been government employees and it wouldn’t have changed the rest of the movie. The attempts at humor were hit-or-miss. I loved the whole scene where Sam tries to keep the Autobots hidden from his parents, despite the fact that none of the characters actions in the scene made much sense. On the other hand, the scene where Bumblebee “leaks coolant” on Agent Simmons was tasteless, and had already been done better with Sam’s dog and Ironhide. The casting is great, both for the on-screen actors and the voice actors. Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox do a fine job, and the supporting cast is excellent. John Turturro’s Agent Simmons stole all the scenes he was in. More great actors filled other supporting roles, like Jon Voight as the Secretary of Defense, Bernie Mac as car salesman Bobby Bolivia, and Peter Jacobson as Sam’s history teacher. I don’t know what the Transformers sounded like in the old cartoon, but all their voices seemed to fit.

Overall, Transformers is fun, escapist science-fiction action, and if transforming robots sound like fun to you, this is your movie!